Vast open skies glittered with stars splashed like paint flicks and a moon so yellow, so round, so perfect called my anxiety filled heart to be still. Warm Summer wind kissed the pale and bruised of my skin, and the cool water whispered a sense of peace my broken soul longed for.
The lake night was the night my heart wanted to plunge into the water’s glistening depths, where the pain of life would no longer be felt. Where the voices in my head that spoke of my rubbish existence and my used state, which was of no worth to anyone, would forever be silenced.
As I gazed at the splendor of the sky, vibrant life energy stirred up by creation was alive and awake and beckoning me to seek the face of a God I wasn’t sure existed, let alone would care for someone as broken and messy as me.
I cried out…
The lake night, the night that was intended to end my life awakened me instead to a very present God. A God who was gently speaking to me without a sound, and was guiding me in and through all things, and somehow, despite the mess and the deep dark hole that I had kept on digging, He was here now, inviting me to seek His face.
The splendor of creation was awakening this wretched girl who was soul numb and dying inside, to the glorious presence of Jesus and entwining my heart to a grander story. His creation was designed to wake us up to Him.
For the last seventeen years, God has been waking me up through His creation, breathing truth words into my soul. Beckoning me to walk this wild faith life that invites us to live wide-awake, and it has happened as His truth words whispered in the midst of living the ordinary everyday life.
I have woken up to the truth that early morning cuddles and silly songs with young ones are holy work.
My soul has come alive as the sun kisses the sea and bounces brilliant colors across the sky or when I've held my baby boys for the first time… and in these moments I've discovered you can’t help but worship Him profoundly and purely.
I come alive where trust is tested, and dreams are shattered, and life doesn’t have the perfect Instagram post because He is with me and He is faithful.
I have experienced authentic relationships over cups of hot tea, long talks, and prayer that leads to healing and restoration because I'm no longer numb and afraid inside.
I now understand that the work God has entrusted to us is the way in which He touches the world through us, where people encounter the face-to-face with God… and it's beautiful.
These life experiences with creation, humanity, and brokenness have been used to wake me up and by His grace, grow my soul into who God created me to be.
That’s what life is meant to do; it becomes the God-at-work, groundwork within that teaches us how to work with and walk with Jesus in the everyday ordinary, waking us up to His presence alive and at work within and around us. It’s like leaven permeating every part of our soul, enlarging and expanding the kingdom of God within us, teaching us, gracing us in our fumbling and stumbling to live into and be the fragrance who He created us to be. We become part of the story He is telling the world.
The invitation to wake up is not just for the select few; it’s for every single one of us. Messy and broken, rich or poor, fatherless or famous, each of us is invited to wake up and live into this wide-awake life with the Creator of the universe. As we live awake, it changes us, it changes the way we see and experience the world around us, and it wakes us up to the grander story being told… His…